Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Looking Back

I paged back through some of my BOMM posts, and I realized a few things.

1) I had ridiculous expectations for this new job as for it being some kind of cure all for my non-writing. Here I am, nearly a year into my "new" job and not only am I writing less, but I'm also reading less. I'm generally just accomplishing less than before. I'm even working out less. Yet, I feel busier. I don't even have kids. Maybe it's not kids that make people feel busy, it's just being in their 30s. I hate feeling this busy. What am I rushing around for? And am I really rushing around? I didn't do a damn thing today aside from work, run, eat, fill out a form, make some lunches, fold some clothes while watching this on tv, and then tool around online. Oh, I showered, too. That's not a lot. I need to do more. Reading and writing needs to be in there everyday, but goddamn if I could figure out where.

2) I had a lot to say about my weight loss, though none of it was entirely enlightening. Oh, that's nearly a pun or something right there. Anyway, weight loss in practice is just hard work in correcting a mistake. It's like using a shitty eraser. It takes a lot of time, you have to take it slow, and you're still going to leave green streaks on the paper and never really mark out what was already there. Right now I'm sitting at around 218, I think, so I'm okay, but it just never feels like enough. I still feel terribly fat and out of shape. Like today, my goal was to run from home to the Capitol and back. I made it there and about a quarter (or so) way back before I broke down and couldn't do it anymore. I know I can do better. Yeah, that's weight loss right there in a nutshell. "I suck, I suck, I suck. I'm still sucking. I suck less than yesterday, maybe, but sucking is I." That's not enlightening, that's depressing and telling people what they already know.

3) I miss doing Bad Music Sundays, but they all would have commercials in front of them now, probably.

4) I need to write more reviews. I also need to read more (see number 1).

5) I have a preoccupation with the politics of men's bathrooms and also I'm shitty at picking MLB teams.

6) Mustaches are still awesome.

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